How Would You Say Real Life BDSM/Kink varies from Fantasy BDSM/Kink?
The biggest difference is informed consent. You don’t often explicitly see it in the fantasy side. Hell, there are times it is completely ignored (I’m looking at you 50 Shades) and if that was the real world people would be emotionally and even physically harmed, the law could even be involved. We don’t just need vague consent, we need the person to actually know the details of what they’re consenting to.
In some of the more unusual fetishes, yes I have found a way to make this about dollification, there are things that can only exist in fantasy. There is no magic spell or potion that will turn anyone into an doll. This also applies to giant/giantess fetishism, we can’t make someone 12 feet tall or shrink someone down. They are purely in the world of science fiction and fantasy.
Finally, would you really just suddenly become the submissive/slave of someone you barely knew after one whole date? Or if they suddenly bent you over a desk and spanked you for getting your work wrong? Of course not, because in the first case you need to get to know the person and work out what you both want from a pretty intense long term power exchange. In the second case they have just assaulted you.
Have I missed anything? Anything you want to add? Leave a comment!